Cheating: Common Misconceptions

CHEAT (v):1.) deceive somebody: to deceive or mislead somebody, especially for personal advantage
2.) be unfaithful: to have a sexual relationship with somebody other than a spouse or regular sexual partner

In light of these definitions it’s safe to say that someone who commits such acts is a cheater so why is it then that I stumble across people who seem to have come up with their own definition for the word? I’ll tell you why, because these people are idiots to say the least.

I’ve had people go so far as to tell me that it isn’t cheating if you and your significant other are in different area codes. Are you kidding me?! But wait, I’ve only had men tell me that nonsense. Aaah, yes, that explains it! Continuing, I’ve also heard that it isn’t cheating if you guys have never had sex but you’ve engaged in other sexual activities which include but are not limited to: kissing and fondling. BULLSHIT. It’s all considered cheating. If you’re in a relationship and on a date with someone (other than your partner) who you’d like to be more than just your friend then it’s cheating--I don’t care how you slice it.

What I can’t understand is why these women (and men but more so women) are so quick to run back to these men after they’ve blatantly disrespected them and showed how much they don’t give a muthafudge. WAIT, I know why, because "he loves me" so it's okay.

(to be continued)…

[Follow me on twitter: www.twitter.com/just_shanelle]

In other words...

This is a translation of all the most common things that guys say. You know how whenever you're having a conversation with a guy and he says one thing but you're not sure if it's genuine? Well this is what he really means:

• When are you going to come visit me?

IN OTHER WORDS: When are you coming over so I can try to have sex with you?

• Whatever happens happens.

IN OTHER WORDS: I would like sex to happen and if it doesn't what will happen is I will eventually stop talking to you.

• I'm not ready for a relationship.

IN OTHER WORDS: I'm not into you enough to make you my girlfriend but I'm always open to sex.

• I'll call you.

IN OTHER WORDS: I won't call you and if I do it'll be for my own benefit.

• You're like a sister to me.

IN OTHER WORDS: I am in no way interested in you on a sexual level. We're just friends but I'm a moron who doesn't know how to say what I mean.

• I can't give you the attention you deserve.

IN OTHER WORDS: I'm a really crappy person who has his own best interest in mind.

• I don't like everyone in my business.

IN OTHER WORDS: I'm a sneaky liar and cheater (if given the opportunity).

• (in response to "what are you doing?") Thinking about you.

IN OTHER WORDS: I wasn't thinking about you but I need to make sure I have you just where I want you.

• Stop being scary.

IN OTHER WORDS: Stop being so difficult and let's just have sex. And oh yeah, I'm an idiot with poor persuasion techniques.

• I love you.

IN OTHER WORDS: I love how you love me.

disclaimer: Now, don't get me wrong he may actually be sincere when he says any of these things but as history has shown me 8 times out of ten he really means something other than what he's saying. It's up to you to note and study carefully his actions so you can properly determine whether or not he's an "in other words" type of guy.

*if you feel that I have left out any other common lines please tell me and I'll gladly add them. Oh yeah, and follow me on twitter http://twitter.com/just_shanelle.

The Under Wire Push-Up Bra

I'm up relatively early on a Friday morning considering the fact that I don't have a job or any real things to do today. I'm just sitting here staring into space really. What am I thinking about? Good question. I'm actually thinking about my past relationships (and I use that word loosely) and how at the time I thought I was "in love," so to speak. It's become clear that I was never "in love" with that person rather the potential that I saw in them. That's crazy isn't it?! I bet many have never thought of it like that. Potential is like an underwire [padded] push-up bra. That is, like a push-up bra it gives the illusion that someone is different from what they really are. Imagine the disappointment on a guy's face when he realizes your c-cups are really a-cups. Scary isn't it?! It makes it hard to determine whether a person is really as they are or if we're being deceived [by potential].

How can we avoid such trickery? Well first, you need to know that potential is the capacity to become something more than the actuality. So, if you are talking to or dating someone that only exhibits certain characteristics every once in a while and doesn't permanently employ them then chances are you're attracted their potential [to grow]. But see, that doesn't mean they'll ever grow, all that means is that he/she could change and while change is inevitable you can never predict which areas this change will occur. However, that's not to say abandon your significant other upon the discovery that you're attracted to their potential.

Some people do change and you might be lucky enough to have someone who's willing to do that. If you feel you're with someone who will [eventually] change then go ahead and stay with them. But if you know you're stuck with someone who isn't willing to meet you half way then you need to be on the first thing smokin' because at that point it becomes a waste of your time--valuable time that you could invest in someone else.

Dead End, Turn Around.

And it still stands, guys will always be full of shit. That's somethin' that'll never change. They'll lie to you every chance they get, but for no reason. Do not invest in those dead end relationships, you know, the ones where the guy claims he doesn't want a girlfriend or where he claims he doesn't want everyone in his business so he wants to keep it on the low, that just means he's tryin' to screw anything walkin' and some shit that doesn't. haha. If he tells you you're the one for him, he's lying through his off white teeth. If he has some suspect ass shit in his away message and when you press him about it he has some faulty ass excuse, he's hiding something. If he tells you you're wifey, that may be true until he gets bored or a cuter piece of ass walks past and BOOM, just like that you have been dethroned. If he acts like he's jealous of other guys you're friends with, he's not, that's just his way of asserting his dominance in you guys' half assed relationship and it's also his way of making sure you're all about him when he's not all about you. Ooh, but I'm just sayin' tho, don't mind me. =)

Your Side of the Street

So today I was sitting around with some friends and engaging in a typical conversation about relationships. What else is new? My thoughts exactly. But this particular conversation really resonated with me and that's why I've decided to share this.
In a relationship you ALWAYS have to take care of yourself before you can fix your significant other. In other words keep your side of the street clean. If your mate does not recognize the changes you've made and refuses to follow suit, let it go. At this point in life no one can afford to be hindered by someone who isn't carrying their own weight. Like Jeezy has said this is a RECESSION. What does he or she have to offer you if they can't get themselves together? Why settle?

NINE EASY STEPS to having MEANINGLESS SEX

1) Keep your shirt and socks on, never give him too much.

2) Do not kiss.

• It's time consuming.


• It takes away from the guy's stroke and if he's already not doing so well he definitely does not need to be distracted.


• It's extremely intimate and encourages attachment. Oh no, that's no good.

3) Do not make eye contact.

• It establishes a sort of intrapersonal relationship.


• The only thing you need to establish is an orgasm.

4) NEVER say his name.

• Makes him feel he's in control and that he's "the man." You don't need that.

5) Make him give you cunnilingus (sounds like an STD but it isn't), or oral sex. If he hasn't performed it before get him used to the idea. Soon you will break him.

6) When it's all done, do NOT cuddle.

• Once again, this is grounds for an intrapersonal relationship which isn't needed.

7) Never take more than 10mins to get dressed.

8) Go home and sleep in your own bed.

9) When you guys depart, do not reach for a hug unless he initiates. Otherwise, a simple "talk to you later" will suffice.

-This is mainly for the girls seeing as to where guys are pretty adept in this area.

Amateur blogger

Okay, so I'm extremely new at this. It took me forever to figure out how to get back to the home page which I guess on here is called the "dashboard." I basically constructed this page as sort of a mode of ventilation. I have so many valid points to express and I feel that for the time being this is the most accurate way to advertise those points.

In case you're wondering, the beautiful baby girl above is Oriana [est. March 17th, 2009], my niece--whom I love and adore.

Okay, well this is just a test run to see how this is gonna come out so with that said I'm outty 500!!!

xoxo,

Stoney Bee